The BJJ Community & Suicide Prevention

Peter Holmes

The danger you can’t always see and how the BJJ community can help.

Awareness, by definition, is the state of knowing, understanding, or recognizing something that exists or is happening. As people, we are constantly trying to stay aware of the events around us, our environments, the people in our lives, and even perspectives different from our own.

In the middle of our busy lives, however, there is one area that deserves more of our attention: mental health.

September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, a time dedicated to raising awareness, sharing resources, encouraging conversations, and breaking the stigma surrounding mental health and suicide. Suicide has affected countless individuals, families, friendships, and communities. Because of that, it is important that we learn to recognize when someone may be struggling and understand how we can support them.

Warning Signs to Watch For

Someone who is struggling may not always directly ask for help. Warning signs can include:

●      Expressing hopelessness, feeling like a burden, or talking about wanting to die.

●      Withdrawing from friends, family, teammates, or activities they normally enjoy.

●      Significant changes in mood, behavior, or sleeping patterns.

●      Acting noticeably different from the person you normally know.

Recognizing these changes does not mean we have all the answers. It simply gives us an opportunity to check on someone.

Sometimes a simple question such as, “How are you doing?” or “I haven’t seen you in a while—is everything okay?” can open the door to a conversation someone desperately needs.

How We Can Help

If you or someone you know is struggling or experiencing a crisis, help is available.

In the United States, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. In Canada, 9-8-8 also provides suicide crisis support. The Crisis Text Line can also be reached in the United States by texting HOME to 741741.

Beyond providing resources, one of the most meaningful things we can do is be present.

Listen without immediately judging or trying to solve everything. Show compassion and empathy. Let the person know that their feelings matter and encourage them to connect with professional support when needed.

Organizations such as NAMI and SAMHSA also provide educational resources, toolkits, and information designed to encourage conversations about suicide prevention and mental health.

The BJJ Community Has an Opportunity

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu is a unique community.

Walk into almost any academy and you will find people of different ages, professions, cultures, races, ethnicities, and life experiences sharing the same mats. For an hour or two, those differences often fade into the background. We drill together. We roll together. We compete together. We help each other improve.

Over time, the people we train with become much more than training partners.

One of the things I appreciate most about the BJJ community is how people notice when someone is missing.

When a teammate who normally trains several times a week suddenly disappears, people often ask, “Where have they been?” Someone sends them a message. A coach checks in. A teammate tells them, “We haven't seen you in a while. Come back and train.”

Those small interactions matter more than we may realize.

We also see that sense of community when someone new walks into an academy. People introduce themselves, invite the new person to drill, explain how class works, and introduce them to others around the mat. Something that may seem routine to us can make someone else feel welcomed, valued, and included.

That sense of belonging is powerful.

But we can take it one step further.

Checking on someone should not stop with asking when they are coming back to training. Sometimes we need to ask how they are doing outside of Jiu-Jitsu.

A teammate may look completely fine while training and still be fighting a battle nobody else can see. The person who is laughing before class, helping newer students, competing every weekend, or encouraging everyone else may still be struggling privately.

We should never assume that because someone appears strong, they do not need support.

More Than Training Partners

Jiu-Jitsu teaches us to recognize when a training partner is in danger. When someone taps, we stop. We protect one another because we understand that the person across from us has trusted us with their safety.

That responsibility should not disappear when we step off the mats.

We can check on the teammate who has been absent. We can listen when someone tells us they are having a difficult time. We can encourage people to seek professional help when they need it. Most importantly, we can build academies where talking about mental health is not viewed as weakness.

We do not need to be therapists or mental health professionals to care about someone.

We just need to be willing to notice.

Be willing to listen.

Be willing to reach out.

Suicide prevention is bigger than one month, one social media post, or one conversation. It is about creating communities where people know that they matter.

The BJJ community already understands the importance of supporting our teammates on the mats. Now we have an opportunity to make sure we are supporting them off the mats as well.

Sometimes the most important thing we can do for a training partner has nothing to do with Jiu-Jitsu.

Sometimes it is simply reminding them that they are not alone.